Plans and Determining Steps

In my last post I shared that I was heading in the direction of a Counseling Licensure. To date, I still am not settled on going that direction. Why? Well, while I love working in the more compassionate fields, I still am seeking one that fully uses all of my gifts and talents. I love to get my hands dirty. I love creating something out of something. I love being a shoulder to lean on. I love researching and investigating to come to a conclusion and answer. I love finishing something and feeling that sense of accomplishment when I complete a project. I love comforting and praying with those who grieve and rejoice. I love being able to see something factual versus something conceptual, and I love Grey's Anatomy and ER (Hollywood)...that was a joke but I do like the medical side of those shows. All that said, I have my sights set on the Physician Assistant Program at the University of Colorado...same course load, same pressure but better outcome and it's cheaper. Jason and I spent some time talking about it the other night and he said, "I looked at the program online and, honestly, I got excited about it myself!" It was confirming to know that he thought it was something that I may be a little more cut out to do. I know I could do either but I am feeling way more excitement and am completely up for the challenge.


So, I am looking at starting the program in the Fall of 2012. It could be a little sooner but I have to get some prerequisite courses (like Chemistry) out of the way in order to start. I also have to take the GRE, so if any of you reading this have a GRE study guide, let me know. There is no time like the present to start studying. I am thankful that my kids are in a good school, that I have a job that will allow me to pursue this degree, that I served my country and have the benefit of the GI Bill and Post 9-11 GI Bill and that my husband is willing to help me balance our lives in the midst of all that we have on our plates. I am thankful that I have mentors, family, and friends to process life with as I discern my steps. I've had several interruptions in life but God is providing all that is before me now and the means to do it. Also, my experiences in life have led me to this very place. In the program Jason and I run, we promote self sufficiency, education, faith, and facing our challenges with courage (among other things). Who am I if I don't live that out myself?


If the steps that I take don't lead to the outcome that I've painted in this post here, I am confident and content in knowing that God will guide my steps to the very place where His glory is being lived out through me. Like Eric Liddell says in Chariots of Fire, "I believe God made me for a purpose, but he also made me fast. And when I run I feel His pleasure." My life means nothing if that's not my goal in life. God made me for a purpose, he made me with certain gifts and talents and I just want to use them and feel His pleasure through being a mom, wife, friend, sister, daughter, niece, granddaughter, cousin, social worker, physician, counselor or any role I play to the world in the future. The question is, "How will I be a light in which ever course of life I choose?" I trust God when He closes doors and He has closed many for which I am grateful.


Hope this touches someone, if not, thanks for letting me process in writing.
God's peace....


Proverbs 16:9
"In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps."

This photo was taken when I graduated with my Bachelor's Degree in May 2009

Fall 2010:Two and Almost a Half Year Update

I have been meaning to post updates about our life here in Denver since we moved to Capitol Hill and I am finally doing it. It seems like there is a lot to catch everyone up on but I am going to start with this year.

We started off the year with a Spring time trip to New York to see family and friends. It was a great two weeks in Bath, New York and my birthday weekend in New York City. We got to see old and dear friends that weekend and we laughed more than we have in a few years. In mid-July, Jason accepted a  30 day Chaplaincy internship with the Air Force. He experienced ministry life at five different bases and gained a greater knowledge of what Chaplaincy is like Air Force wide. He enjoyed his experience and it sparked a fire in both of us to serve the military community in the future. When that is, we don't know but we do know that we love the military for the people that serve in it. Jason's favorite base on the tour was Lackland AFB, where we both went to basic training. There he got to spend time with basic trainees prior to their graduation. 

At the end of August, Christian started Kindergarten. We placed him in first grade initially but found he wasn't ready for it. That was humbling to find out that he wasn't ready to jump in with their first grade curriculum. Last year we home-schooled him thinking we were going to home-school more in the future so we didn't put to much pressure on ourselves to follow a curriculum and we went at his pace but that didn't prepare him for the school system that he is in now. Regardless, he is right where he needs to be and it won't matter in the long run as long as he is learning and being challenged. He surprises us sometimes and I am amazed how much he has sprouted since being in school. He is thoughtful and asks us some of the deepest questions. We think he has a future in philosophy but he expresses that he wants to be an artist or a doctor and loves to sing while strumming on his guitar. Josephine is in Pre-K. She is very decisive and daring.She loves her friends and is very nurturing and helpful. She says she wants to grow up be to a mommy so that she can have her own car keys and drive a car with her baby dolls in the back seat. She can do and be whatever she wants in my book.

 

Jason and I are still co-directing a transitional home with Providence Network. For those of you that don't know, we've been directing a home for women and kids who are escaping domestic violence, homelessness and addictions. We have been here since May 2008 which is when Jason graduated from Denver Seminary with his Master's of Divinity. He is a Air Force Chaplain Candidate and is pursing ordination with the Anglican Mission in America. He is also going to pursue Reserve Chaplaincy as we await the potential for him to go into active duty Chaplaincy. It is a long term goal and for now we are staying put until God reveals otherwise to us. 

One highlight for me is that I made the decision this summer to apply at Denver Seminary. After carefully and prayerfully weighing my priorities, reflecting on my past experiences and developing the gifts God has given me, I decided that getting a Masters in Counseling would be the best fit for me. I received my acceptance letter late this summer and plan to start during the Spring. I have been feeling a little hesitant to start school because, being the indecisive creature that I am, I have a lot of interests and struggle to make the commitment to just one thing. However, this degree is going to challenge me beyond any other interest and it is going to help me embrace discomfort...I like being comfortable but I know it is time for me to start liking discomfort for the sake of my own personal growth and most of all for the sake of living out God's glory through the gifts He has given me. So, at the end of it all, I will have a counseling licensure (community and school) and hopefully use it to comfort, encourage, coach and challenge others the way that I have been. 

Family life is typical for two parents of kids the age of 4 and 6. Bedtime is our least favorite conflict. They constantly test their will and we enforce ours yet we grow. We love our kids and are blessed to have them. We don't know if more are in our future but remain content with the two we have. Once upon a time I saw having gobs of kids as a right of passage but I don't subscribe to that philosophy anymore. Being a mother of many kids doesn't validate who I am nor does it make me a better follower of God. Doing the best with what I have...loving God and loving them is what makes the difference. Marriage keeps getting better and I can't complain about the 30 days that Jason and I spent apart in July and August. We spend A LOT of time together because we are co-workers and that can easily make us complacent. I am blessed to have Jason in my life. He took me as I am and has challenged me and loved me unconditionally. I am looking forward to the continuing journey ahead.